A year in review - from a biased point of view. Of course
It's the last day of work before I spend the next two weeks on timetabled rotation of: stuffing my face, dancing it off, drinking, sleeping, watching movies swaddled in bed, playing Taboo, and vaguely trying to sort out my wardrobe/CD collection/life.
But before all the fun begins, let's take a moment and gaze back over 2007. In terms of what I've been writing about this year, for me 2007 was the year that the celebrity world went completely bonkers and the media - be it tmz.com, the Guardian or the blog mafia - were all on hand to record every nip slip and meltdown, every DUI and every spermination.
Now it's not just about the written word, it's about the pictures, the leagues of stalking paps armed with their long lenses and their video cameras. The every day lives of famous people have become headline grabbing news. In the past two months alone I was asked to be on four TV shows commenting on, you guessed it, the celeb big hitters.
Britney Spears:
Everyone assumed that once Brit split from K-Fed she would sort her s**t out and get back to being the kick ass pops
tar she once was. Instead she decided to fall out of cars plastered off her nut with Paris Hilton exposing her shorn cooch. Then she shaved her head to match her vagina, used an umbrella-ela-ela-aye as a pap-thwacking weapon. What swiftly followed was the sort of stuff you just can't make up: flipping out at an OK! Weekly shoot, losing custody of her kids, making out with randoms in swimming pools, getting tested for drugs, having the worst extensions money can buy (yeah, I know, the tragedy), all of which culminated in her VMA performance in September where a slightly squidgy Brit squeezed out the most abysmal performance of her career. It was like watching a porpoise on qualludes.
Rather brilliantly, Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance recently said that Brit was his heroine of the year. "That shaving her heard was awesome, that was one of my hightlights of the year! I have had a lot of momenty where I 
can identify with her."
Incredibly Brit still managed to release a halfway decent album.
Speaking of celebs with child: Nicole Richie, Halle Berry, Lily Allen, Stella McCartney, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez, Christina Aguilera, Cate Blanchett, Edith Bowman and erm Javine all announced their fertility.
And who popped them out? Emma Bunton, Milla Jovovich, Salma Hayek, Isla Fisher, Charlotte Church, Katie Price, Helena Bonham-Carter, Myleene Klass, Lauren Laverne. Phew! That's a lot of epidurals and frantic post-placental workouts, I imagine.
Lindsay Lohan has had quite a year of it too, what between her three stints in rehab, her multiple DUIs, her film flops, her first sliverscreen sex scene and her family communicating with each other purely through media sources - just like a real 21st century disfunctional family. She started the year off romping with Calum Best and ended it ditching her rehab love and maxing out her credit card.
2007 was also the years Kate Moss finally kicked her bad habit: Mr. Pete Doherty. It went from them announcing their engagement, collaborating musically, posting intimate youtube vids (see below), to revelations that Doherty was still using drugs and dinking other chicks. Well, what did she expect.
Along with launching her successful Topshop range and causing carnage on the London streets
, Moss seems to have finally settled down with The Kills Jamie Hince. She and Sienna have buried the hatchet. (And Sienna is busy getting cosy with Rhys Ifans).
And Pete? Well he got engaged to model Irina who he used to date back in the day and whom Moss used as a model for her fashion line, but he's now sacked her off in favour of some blonde called Portia.
Back over to Hollywood now for some time with Paris Hilton and the heiress's time in the slammer. She spent the hard time contemplating the pointlessness of her existence and ingesting mystery meat instead of fillet mignon. Bummer. Since she emerged from lockdown she's done little to change the world, although she has changed outfits an awful lot.
Amy Winehouse has had a year full of more ups and downs than Jodie Marsh has breast
belts. She's had a number one, kick ass album, been nominated and won a slew of awards, married her junky boyfriend Blake Civil-whatdoyacallhim. Then it all started to go very wrong: the tales of her vomiting blood, hookers in hotel rooms, heroin, and killing people's hamsters, videos of her apparently sticking something up her nose.
Brief stints in rehab followed, hot holidays for recuperation which seemed to do exactly bugger all because Wino was back touring and doing press, dosing off in interviews fag in hand.
Then came hubby up for GBH for assaulting a barman with his mate. Days away from the trial, a newspaper filmed him trying to pervert justice by bribing the barman with £200K. Wonder where he got the money from? Blake was unceremoniously arrested on November 9 and he's been in the slammer ever since. Then Amy was arrested and bailed after being questioned about her possible involvement in the pay off.
Phew. Her soap opera life is almost as unbelievable as Sunset Beach.
We've been rocked by tragic deaths - hello Anna Nicole Smith, (not to mention Norman Mailer, Anita Roddick, Mike Reid, Pavorotti and more).
On a personal level, I spent far too much time replaying the five second dramatic chipmunk clip.
And lamenting the intelligence of my country of birth.
I've also spent a helluva lot of time dressed like an idiot making a dick of myself in front of celebrities. Painting myself green and trying to flirt with the Trousersnake,
Dressing like Marge Simpson,
And asking Bruce Willis about the buffness of is bod.
Happy days.
And Happy Christmas.
Till next year.
ktbx
rather than falling out of clubs in 2008. But it appears Lily is determined to become a valuable role model to her sprog. 
It must be the season of goodwill – sworn enemies Kate Moss and Sienna Miller now seem to be best friends, theBuzz can reveal. The bitter rivals finally buried the hatchet last night when Kate and boyfriend Jamie Hince popped round to Sienna’s place, complete with a painting as a peace offering. 
Katie Holmes on Cruise's kiddies: 
because the capital is “too busy” and she wants to avoid the showbiz scene. She is the latest celebrity to swap the party circuit for a pad out of town so she can escape the glare of the media. 
